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going to college to become an american girl doll

getting on grindr and cruising for twinks because I need my kernel recompiled and two dozen joke toots explained to me

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a twink is a man from Stuttgart who uses Linux and has a bowl haircut

saw someone talking about how they got a "reusable soup container" and it took me a good two minutes to realize that they did not mean "a container for reusable soup"

I Don't Want To Be Inflated Big and Round Any More, I Want To Be Debbie

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compaq presario hoisted upon my back, south park computer virus embedded in my email signature

getting a dopamine hit from putting together an ikea end table >>>

bad news for fans: leaked documents reveal that 2020 was supposed to be the year of linux on the desktop, before it was postponed indefinitely due to the pandemic

clifford the big red dog is only red because he has been bathed in the blood of untold numbers of innocents

clifford the big red dog is a criminal who belongs in The Hague

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This is a calibration toot. Please use it to adjust and set your toots properly. Thank you.

uspol, Bari Weiss, cancel culture 

Bari Weiss has been so thoroughly shut down by the liberal wrongthink mob that she only has five agents to handle all her speaking, writing and public appearance requests

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ive just received an email from tv superstar mr bean, and he wants me to transfer one thousand US dollars into his bank account. first the global pandemic, now this, im honestly not surprised by anything any more!

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(sees someone playing kingdom hearts) oh looks like someone's watching a little disneyball... did you find out what the most keyb lade is yet

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now they should call him "shush" limbaugh because he's quiet, on account of the dying

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